#0 · Aug 27, 2004, 09:30 · Selski

I'll keep this brief.

Actually, I'm rather embarrassed about posting this because I feel utterly stupid and gullible, which I assure you, I am not in the physical world! [:I]

I have been wanting to meet my guides for a time now, but nothing so far.  Until today.  I saw a group of monkeys and went up to them.  They were talking.  I went to one who had a hat on.  The first thing I said was "Are you a spirit guide".  Of course, it said yes.  To cut to the quick, we had a little chat, I didn't get anything sensible out of it, but I was a little awestruck at meeting a guide anyway, so I didn't ask sensible questions.

I got the impression it wanted to have sex with me [:O] and I consented [:O][:O].  Oops.  I was an astral virgin before this!!!

In retrospect, I think it was a low-life astral dude and I walked very nicely into its trap.  What a fool!

Oh well, another lesson learned. And I'm normally so cautious .

Sarah

#1 · Aug 27, 2004, 10:00 · Frank

Sorry, but I couldn't resist a little chuckle at you losing your astral cherry. :)

Yours,
Frank

#2 · Aug 27, 2004, 10:22 · astralpwka

Well, as funny as that would be, it also kind of freaks me out. I can see this spirit sitting around drinking his astral beer with his buddies sharing the sexual exploit. Their response: "Wow, next time I get to wear the hat!"

#3 · Aug 27, 2004, 10:28 · Selski

quote:
Originally posted by astralpwka

I can see this spirit sitting around drinking his astral beer with his buddies sharing the sexual exploit. Their response: "Wow, next time I get to wear the hat!"
*Selski has just laughed her head off and it has rolled to the other side of the room!*

- here is her head!

#4 · Aug 27, 2004, 11:12 · T_Kman0610

SO tell us Selski, what will you name the astral monkey babies?[ :D ]
I have never heard anyone talk of monkeys who called themselves guides lol it cracks me up! [ :P ]

Alright ill stop lol have fun with your guides

,T_Kman0610

#5 · Aug 27, 2004, 12:21 · Frank

quote:
Originally posted by astralpwka

Well, as funny as that would be, it also kind of freaks me out. I can see this spirit sitting around drinking his astral beer with his buddies sharing the sexual exploit. Their response: "Wow, next time I get to wear the hat!"
Frank has just wet himself laughing!

#6 · Aug 27, 2004, 12:54 · Adun

i know everything is possible in the astral, but i never thought i would hear of someone who had sex with a monkey wearing a hat[ :D ]

#7 · Aug 27, 2004, 16:56 · AntiGravity

Hehehe, this is a pretty funny topic. Im loving what astralpwka said, lol. Yea, thats kinda wierd that you did it with a monkey, I didnt even know monkeys were equipped, lol. So like, you asked to see spirit guides and you got a bunch of horny talking monkeys...Well, I now know to stay away from that. But this question keeps nagging at me, did you enjoy it? LOL, sorry for kinda making fun Sarah, its just so awkward and...out there, lol.
Like you said, another lesson learned!
Take care!

#8 · Aug 27, 2004, 18:56 · Naiad780

Seriously, monkeys are always messing with me in my dreams.  Once they threw all of my winter clothes in a trash can and laughed at me.  Another time they evacuated every human and animal except me off the planet in a spaceship, and stuck their heads out the spaceship windows and laughed and pointed at me while they blasted off.

I bet your monkey was from the same group.  Bastards.

#9 · Aug 29, 2004, 18:34 · Astral-Jas

quote:
Originally posted by Frank

Sorry, but I couldn't resist a little chuckle at you losing your astral cherry. :)

Yours,
Frank
LOL! okay and another lol for you falling into that goofy little trap.[ :P ]

But it didn't scare you or anything atleast. Was it fun?

#10 · Aug 29, 2004, 19:56 · Kerrblur

O my Gosh! I have not been on the forum in awhile and This is the fricken hillarious. I am looking for your guides and petting them

#11 · Aug 29, 2004, 23:13 · BlackTalon

First thing that came to mind was the 3 monkeys, see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. One with his hands over his eyes...ect ect...

still funny story though...definetly different.

#12 · Aug 30, 2004, 06:46 · Chimerae

Okay, this is second hand info, but it comes from a source I trust.

I have a client who's a talented healer with a powerful totem animal that's a tiger.  We do a fair amount of tiger work, but it was out of pattern with much of the tiger work I knew.

One day, just socializing at lunch I asked her about it and she said that she had a really strong past life memory about being a sacred tiger at the shrine of the monkey god -- that she ATE monkeys as part of her "duties" at the shrine and that as a consequence she had a really great connection with Hanuman, but that to work with the connection without getting into trouble, she had to be a tiger.

My brilliance is uneven, so I didn't even know who Hanuman was.  Monkeys SCARE me so I may have just avoided that knowledge.

Turns out, he's a divine trickster.  I don't have the strength of character to even look Hanuman up on the Internet.

And that's my little tidbit for what it's worth . . .

#13 · Aug 30, 2004, 11:28 · Selski

Thanks (I think!) for all your comments.

Firstly, I am NOT going to tell you about the specifics of the experience - I am too embarrassed, and this is a public forum! [:I]

Secondly, I did a bit of Internet work on Hanuman (thanks Chimerae).  Turns out he is a monkey god, revered in the East.  He is strong, devoted, wise, etc etc.  Lots of good things.

I doubt very much my hatted monkey was Hanuman.  I doubt very much he is one of my guides either!!

Ho hum.  Onwards and upwards.

Sarah

#14 · Aug 30, 2004, 16:31 · G3MM4

quote:
I didnt even know monkeys were equipped, lol
Of course they're "equipped"! Aren't we evolved from monkeys anyway?

LOL, that must have been weird doing it with a monkey! Was it like doing it with a bloke? (I supposed it must have been similar in some ways and odd in others!)

#15 · Sep 02, 2004, 14:33 · Astral-Jas

Lmao!!! PM me Selski!

lmao rofl...
Didn't you start to laugh half way through getting it on with the monkey? [ :) ]

#16 · Apr 30, 2018, 20:56 · Nameless

Oh Dear God, dare I bring this back up?!! (LMAO)
Needed a laugh today and this is what I get. Sorry I can't stop laughing..

I don't think I could give a monkey the time of day. But there was this one bird boy (young man).. nvrmd :-D

#17 · May 17, 2018, 05:22 · Thread Killer

Wow. Frank...Is there an astral memory lane, Selski?